It's always something! :)

Hey folks! I am sorry it's been so long since I have updated. I have been really struggling physically, and it's taken everything I have to make it through my work shifts. I pretty much crash at the end of the day and on the weekends. I have quite a bit to update you on, so let's get started!

Our appointment with my Lyme doctor in San Francisco went pretty well. It's always good to get his wisdom on our situation. We came armed with about two pages of questions, and we actually got through all of them. I love my doc. He is so relaxed even though he deals with a lot of intense health situations with his patients. He is definitely a perfect fit for my personality. :P We discussed about what happened in my body to make me crash like I did after I had been doing so well. He doesn't necessarily think it's because I took a two-week break from antibiotics. All that break did was tell us that the infection is still very present in my body. He thinks something else (an outside factor) caused the backslide. However, what that was, no one is really sure.

So, what do we do from here? Well, I am just too unstable to hit my body very hard with treatment. He thinks we are kind of on a tipping point. If we push my body too hard, we could tip over into a very bad place. So, he said our goal is to stabilize my system so that we can attack the infection big time some time in the future. This was a bit frustrating for me as I just want to be done with this whole thing. However, this isn't a sprint; it's a marathon. We do want to fight the infections, but we can't damage my body in the process.

One thing good about my doctor is that he has a large number of resources at his disposal. He knows a lot of incredibly amazing physicians who treat Lyme Disease in all different areas of medicine, and he loves to go at treatment with a team approach. So, he gave us a list of people to consult which included both a nutritionist (to help with my super challenging and restrictive diet) and a neurologist (she specializes in working with the autonomic nervous system-my main issue that causes me to be so unstable).

We decided that we are also going to work on fighting my Candida issue. For months now, I have been on maintenance treatment, but he thinks that the Candida might be causing my allergies to get worse. So, we are going to really go after it with a huge hope that this will help my allergic reactions and chemical sensitivities to calm down.

He did say that my extreme herx reaction when I took my antibiotics after my two-week break is a good sign that my Bartonella infection is still responsive to treatment. So, we are very thankful for that. We just need to get me to a place where I can tolerate using more intense drugs without causing my body to crash at the same time. I am terrible at waiting especially after being sick all of these years. So, you can imagine how this is a bit frustrating! Since Rifampin has been such a good drug for me, he wants to try to increase the dose to see if that will be effective before trying a different drug to fight Bartonella. We shall see what happens!

Our trip, in general, went smoothly. I never do very well in San Francisco. The hotel was fine, but I think the high mold count in that area always sets me off. So, Brian and I left early Saturday morning to drive back home. It's always nice to get out of town, but with all of the trouble I usually have, it's EXTREMELY nice to get back home to a more stable and controlled environment.

Once we got home, unfortunately, life did not go back to normal. I felt awful, and we had a new and unpleasant condition pop up. Starting last Monday, every time I drank a glass of water, it wouldn't stay in me longer than 10 minutes - lots of trips to the restroom! The condition is called Diabetes Insipidus. It's where your kidneys do not retain water because you have too much of a certain kind of hormone. For 4 days, I was in a constant state of dehydration. It was horrible, and I felt like I was just watching my body crash. We worked with my doctor quite a bit, and he ordered a test to determine whether or not my symptoms were caused by the above condition. We should hear back today. He told me to stop Rifampin because it is known for messing with the hormones in your body. It could be indirectly causing this issue. Thankfully, things are slowly improving. I am still having trouble keeping water in my body, but it's not as bad. I am not in such a crazy dehydrated state.

Since we have been off Rifampin, my Bartonella symptoms have gotten worse. My dysautonomia has come back full force. It's hard to get through the day with all of the symptoms. So, now you know why it's been so challenging lately! We have kind of been in survival mode. Brian had to take off work last Thursday so that I could go to the Urgent Care (we needed to make sure my dehydration wasn't in the danger zone) and then to go get labs drawn. He is so amazing! The sacrifices he makes for me are so humbling. I thank the Lord for him every day!

The final update is I have started working the neurologist that my Lyme doctor recommended. I had an initial phone consult with her yesterday, and she is extremely smart. She understood how Lyme has impacted my autonomic nervous system better than any other doctor has. She has an extensive background in biological neurology along with treating using holistic and integrative measures AND she takes insurance. Whoohoo! My appointment went well. Obviously, I am very sick (she only takes the sickest patients as my case was pre-screened), but it is good to now have her on our team. She will work directly with my Lyme doctor to help stabilize my system so we can go after the infection. We have such a long road, but it's good to have such amazing doctors on our side! We have an appointment in her office in New Mexico on October 7th. We are excited (but guarded since we have seen so many doctors) to learn about her approach and see how it will help me. We definitely trust our Lyme doctor's opinion. So, if he thinks she will be able to help me, we are hopeful!

Here are current prayer requests:

• Please be praying that I can consistently hold water in my system. The dehydration symptoms are very difficult to tolerate. It kind of feels like you are going crazy or just watching your body quit on you. Please pray for continued improvement! Please also pray for my dysautonomia to improve. I am having a lot of trouble with random tachycardia (rapid heart beat) and feeling like I am going to pass out.


• Please start praying for our appointment. We really need this new doctor to help upright my system. Until we do that, we can't hit the infections like we need to. Please be praying for my appointment on October 7th.


• Please pray that the infection won't get out of control as we try to stabilize my body. The doctor in New Mexico and my doctor in San Francisco are going to try to keep me on a low maintenance dose of treatment during this time. However, my Bartonella infection is getting worse by the day (the symptoms are increasing). Please pray that God place his hands on it and that He would protect me.


• Please that I will have endurance to make it through my job. I am working close to 40 hours a week from my house and from my bed. :) I am so thankful for being able to work virtually, but it's getting harder and harder to make it through each day.


• Please pray for endurance. This latest round has hit us hard. We just feel like we are in survival mode each day. We don't want to live like that. We want to be working for God's kingdom. Please pray that God would continue to use us even though we feel we have so little to give right now. Also, please pray against discouragement. We have a big battle up ahead, but God has given us a good medical team. Please pray that we continue to lay all of our cares upon Christ resting in the fact that he will provide financially, physically and emotionally.

We are still waiting on Brian's results from his CPA exam. He should find out this week! We are desperately praying that he passed this last section. Life is just too crazy to even think about studying for that difficult exam again. We should hear from my doctor today about what our next step should be with the current issues we are facing. I will try and update soon! Blessing to all of you!

Prayers Appreciated!

Hey folks! I wanted to write you a quick update with some pretty important prayer requests as we leave for our doctor's appointment in California. It's been a pretty rough week for me physically. My body seems to be freaking out a bit. We have experienced a lot of this before, but it's never fun the second or third time around.

I am a lot more sensitive to things allergy-wise. This is not good timing since we will be traveling and staying in a hotel. However, we have done it before with me in this condition, and God has always pulled us through. So, we are just walking in faith He will protect me on this trip too!

Yesterday, we got some not so good news as a result of a recent lab draw. Apparently, my kidneys are not handling antibiotic treatment anymore. I have elevated kidney function levels. This was pretty discouraging for us. My local doctor said we need to be careful that I don't tip over into mild kidney failure. So, something definitely needs to change. The problem is I don't handle natural treatment protocols very well (like herbs and things) because of how allergic I am. When people's bodies stop tolerating antibiotics that is where people usually turn. However, I have extreme allergic reactions to a lot of that stuff. So, we kind of feel backed into a corner. If we stop antibiotic treatment and don't do anything, the infection will take over. However, if we keep going on our current course, my kidneys will stop functioning and that is not good at all. You kind of need those to live. :P

Maybe, we are just getting to the point where the only option is for God to do a miraculous healing. Brian and I were talking about that exact thing last night. We feel like we are kind of backed into a corner and the only way out is to look up. Maybe, that is where we should be all the time, but humanly, it's definitely hard to do unless all physical earthly options are exhausted. At least it's hard for me to do consistently. :)

So, our appointment could not come at a better time. We have so many decisions to make in such a short amount of time. My appointment usually only lasts about 45 minutes. Please pray that God would multiply our time with the doctor, and that he will have wisdom exactly what to do. Also, please pray for safety as we travel and that God would protect my body. I have started reacting to water again and some of my food too. So, we are facing a lot of challenges right now. We are trusting God that He will come through in all of these areas.

Yesterday, before I found out that news, I was reading my bible and thinking about all that God has helped us overcome. We have had so many victories as we have fought this battle. He has helped us win with a lot stacked against us. He has been our provider and our sustainer. So, as we keep walking down this road, we will once again lay our plans at the Lord's feet. We are praying for a miracle and surrendering to His will.

We'll try to update after our appointment on Friday! Thanks for your prayers! Remember, to give God the glory no matter how bleak things look. He will make streams in the desert! :) Isaiah 35:6

Up down and all around...

Hey folks! Sorry it's been so long. I could have written last week, but I just wasn't in a good emotional place. It's been pretty hard to deal with the backslide, so writing about it seemed overwhelming. I am doing a bit better now, so I am finally in a place where I could handle sharing about it.

Hmmm...where to start? First, I want to say thank you to of all of you who have been a listening ear and such an encouragement to me. I have a couple of dear friends who are also sick with Lyme. Even though they are struggling, they never fail to encourage and lift others up. Thank you so much girls! My husband has also been amazing. He listens to me, encourages me and makes me always see the good side of our situation. I am one lucky girl!

This journey is filled with so many ups and downs. When you feel great, you celebrate, but at the same time you are cautious because you know things could change quickly. I remember in June and July when I was doing so well, it was hard for me to really get excited because I was worried that something would happen. Just about the time when I started coming around emotionally and even started making plans for the future, my body decided to take a trip back to never never land. :P So, that is why this has been so hard to deal with. I got a taste of what it was like to start living a normal life (well not normal to a regular person, but a little bit more normal for me), and then I have had to deal with having to go back to being extremely careful what I come in contact with. It has hit me hard emotionally.

After I relapsed, Brian and I decided we would contact our local chuch (that we went to only a couple of times), and tell them our situation. We were going to ask if we could have some people come to our house every so often so we could get some Christian fellowship. However, now I am at a place where I get set off so easily and the reactions affect my blood pressure. So, we can't do that at this time. That is hard to swallow as I think finally, after 6 years of being isolated, it is really starting to get to us. Brian is going to start attending church regularly and wants to get involved in a men's bible study. So, the strict isolation is more on my side. I have still been able to take some trips in the car to stores. I have even been in a few, but I can't stay very long without getting pretty sick.

Lately, I have been reading James 1. A few of the verses have been really ministering to my heart and carrying me through this tough time. I will share a few with you...

"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So, let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. James 1:2-4 NLT

I really like the translation of the Message for this same passage. It says...

"Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in anyway."

I love the word picture of "faith-life". That is what life is all about. It's one big faith walk; however, we have our loving savior walking on that path with us. It's not a smooth journey, but we can take comfort in the fact that Jesus is there to hold us up when times get tough and won't let us slip. I know it's such a Christian cliche to say, but it's really true. I often just visualize the Lord taking my hand and leading us through this rocky time. It helps!

The other part in these verses that I like is when it says "don't try to get out of anything prematurely". Boy, is that convicting. If I only considered my human nature and desires, I would gladly take an escape hatch right now; however, that is not how I will grow, and would not be part of God's plan. It's been hard and tough, and lately, to be honest, I have wanted to give up, but that is not how I should run this race. I need to do what our wedding verse said (Hebrews 12:1-2) which is to run this race with perseverance keeping our eyes focused on the only place it they should be - on Jesus.

This week is a HUGE week for us. We have been waiting and waiting and waiting for this week. Okay, I have been desperately waiting for September 9th. On September 8th, we will leave Tucson to drive to San Francisco for my doctor's appointment on the 9th. It's at 2pm. Please be praying for this. We have so many questions to get answered in a short amount of time. We have a lot of decisions that need to be made, and we really need a new treatment plan. Please pray that we can bring our doctor quickly up to speed, and that he will know exactly what to do with me. We want to beat this thing, and we desperately need the Lord to give him the wisdom on how to do it with my crazy body. Please also be praying for safe travel and no reactions. It's been a trying month with how my body has freaked out. I seem to be pretty unstable, so we are not sure how well I will tolerate scent filled environments and the long car ride. Also, please be praying that Brian will be blessed with energy to drive for the trip. I am a bit too out of it to help with the driving, and it's always so demanding on him when we go up and back with in 72 hours (it's a 15 hour drive from Tucson). His work has been pretty intense lately, so he is already going into this trip pretty tired.

Well, I need to get to bed. Thanks in advance for your prayers. We'll update when we get back. Through God, we will have the victory!!! Below is a song that has been really encouraging to me. I pray it will bless you also. You will have to hit pause on my blog music player before listening to the song. Enjoy!