Time for Everything

Hey Everyone. I will give a house update first! :) The house is coming together well. We had a great painter come in and use a special paint that is good for people with chemical sensitivities to seal up the walls. The fun part is I got to pick the colors out! :) I will post some pictures once we move in as I can't go in there for a couple of weeks because the paint is still off-gassing. Thank you to my parents who came down and helped my hubby and I get some things done around the house. We are so grateful!

Here is a health update about my last Lyme Disease treatment round that ended Saturday. It was really rough, but thankfully, it was not as rough as it was a couple of weeks ago. I am so relieved because that last one was absolutely horrible. I experienced the normal symptoms from herxing, but also had some symptoms really intensify and some new ones pop-up. On my last post, I think I mentioned something about having a difficult time breathing. Well, that portion of the treatment was worse this time. Starting on Friday, I noticed that I felt like I wasn't getting enough air. It's the strangest thing. I know it's not asthma because I am not wheezing or coughing and I can take my peak flow (a device that measure the air capacity of your lungs) and it measured 450 instead of 500, so not much of a difference. However, I couldn't take a deep breath, and I felt like I was constantly starving for air. It got worse and by Sunday, I was pretty dizzy from it and was in some pain. Sunday night was pretty bad; however, Brian and I have a rule that we won't go to the ER unless I am dying. Seriously, that is our pact that we made, lol. Lyme Disease and the treatment that goes along with it is so controversial and most ER doctors do not react pleasantly (that is putting it nicely) to helping you with your current issue if they don't agree with your treatment protocol. My dear friends, who also have this disease, have experienced this one too many times. Also, I have such horrible chemical and drug sensitivities that every time we go to the ER, I end up reacting to something and I am worse leaving than when I came in. So, that is why we have the "No ER" pact. :) Obviously, we would go if it was absolutely necessary for survival. Sorry, I kind of got off on a tangent there, but I always like to give you guys a picture into our crazy restricted life. It is definitely a roller coaster ride for sure!

Anyways, onto the new symptoms. Starting on Sunday, along with having a lot of trouble with breathing, I started getting tingling in my face, arms and hands and at one point a portion of the right side of my face went temporarily numb. It was pretty crazy. I also started having a lot of trouble concentrating and my short term memory took a turn for the worst. I have had some trouble formulating sentences or stringing together thoughts. Brian and I laugh about it, but it is sometimes frustrating and a little bit unnerving. I try not to get concerned about what will happen in the future, but I guess it's always in the back of my mind. I know that since the Lyme Disease has invaded my brain, when I'm on treatment, the bacteria starts protesting. I also know that what I am experiencing is normal; however, it doesn't make it any easier to deal with. It breaks my heart to see so many of my friends who are also getting treated for Lyme Disease dealing with much of the same issues, and many struggle worse than I do.

At this point, we are still unable to step on treatment. Dr. J wanted me stabilized to a point where I was getting consistent sleep, and I was up to a certain dosage on both an important medication and an important supplement. We are still working on that. Before he will increase treatment for me, he will also watch to see if I start herxing less on my current medication. Obviously, that has not really happened, so I feel we are just kind of at a stand still. It's kind of hard to be in this spot. I so desperately want my life back, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to get there. I want to kill this bacteria that has wreaked so much havoc on my system. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am TERRIBLE at waiting, lol. So, all of this is really trying my patience. I see my friends having a normal life having children, serving in ministry and traveling. It's so hard to not be able to know if and when those things will every happen to Brian and I. It's also hard to see some of my friends who have Lyme Disease further along in their treatment or those who are able to attack the disease more aggressively. I so desperately want that! However, at the same time, I know in my heart that my doctor is wise. I know that he has years of experience in treating this disease, and he will give me the okay to step-up treatment when he thinks I am ready. Awww, another opportunity to learn how to patiently wait. Time to grin and bear it! :P

So, in the meantime, I will praise my God for the things He has blessed me with including an amazing husband, a new house, wonderful friends and family, an awesome Lyme Disease support group and an incredible physician. I am reminded of the verse in Ecclesiastes where it talks about how there is a "time for everything." That is so true and one of these days, I have confidence that Brian and I will look back on this trial as a time that taught us much and grew us closer to our Savior. Until then, we will keep running the race before us focusing on the One who has the power to bring us through.